Sex and writing about it

I cringed when I first wrote about sex and the thought of anybody ever reading it made me immediately delete the entire thing from my screen. As I have become older, I am more comfortable writing about it, but I am still unsure how best to do it. 

I have read such a large number of chapters that describe sex in great detail with the use of euphemisms etc and others who use a more subtle approach. 

I know what I prefer, but what do the majority of young adults prefer? 

I would never want to underestimate a young readers knowledge of sex, but there is a divide between those who have engaged in this activity personally and those that haven’t yet, so which approach is more favourable? 

I decided to use a subtle approach, with intricate details I felt were important. I also wanted it to be honest. I am staying away from crude descriptions and euphemisms which readers may find a bit cringe. I know I do! I am conscious of making the encounters close to reality, particularly for this age of audience. 

My main character is complex and the traumas she has endured are reflected in her approach to sex and relationships. I want to take the reader through her thoughts and feelings during the encounters and it’s a great way to show a characters vulnerabilities and true self. 

This is an example taken from one of my chapters-

‘The agony, stagnant but always within her was triggered and with each thrust there was a hook of pain. The deeper he got the more was released and a thicker ache waved through her, though with it a faint sweet tingle began to filter it’s way through. He became selfish, quickening his pace in such a way that the sweetness and pain vanished altogether and she was left feeling nothing other than desperation for it to end and a sickening regret.’

Any advice would be welcomed on this subject.  

2 thoughts on “Sex and writing about it

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