Sex and writing about it

I cringed when I first wrote about sex and the thought of anybody ever reading it made me immediately delete the entire thing from my screen. As I have become older, I am more comfortable writing about it, but I am still unsure how best to do it. 

I have read such a large number of chapters that describe sex in great detail with the use of euphemisms etc and others who use a more subtle approach. 

I know what I prefer, but what do the majority of readers prefer? 

I decided to use a subtle approach, with intricate details I felt were important. I also wanted it to be honest. I am staying away from crude descriptions and euphemisms which readers may find a bit cringe. I know I do! I am conscious of making the encounters close to reality.  

My main character is complex and the traumas she has endured are reflected in her approach to sex and relationships. I want to take the reader through her thoughts and feelings during the encounters and it’s a great way to show a characters vulnerabilities and true self. 

Any advice would be welcomed on this subject.  

5 thoughts on “Sex and writing about it

  1. Hmm, I struggle as well with writing about sex in young adult. I tend to ask myself whether or not the sex scene moves the plot along or develops a character. If that’s the case, yup, I include it. If not, I don’t want it to be smut for smut’s sake. But a character’s sexuality (and sexual awakening especially in YA) is important! Nice post, thanks for sharing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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